funny response to are you still alive

If they are not going to reply, perhaps the archaeologists who discover their phone will. What an impertinent question to ask a girl! To answer that question, I need to take you back about 12 years. - Anonymous. funny response to are you still alive 09 June 2022. no disease, including cancer, can exist in an alkaline environment / siberian husky mask types Does the new one work any better? 2. My guardian angel be like 2. I've Been Thinking About You Too They might not be with you right now, but they will always be on your mind. What's your sign? He will be missed. 10. "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. Now you can be! Dont let your mind wander. Nevertheless, it can be a great approach to start a lively discussion! I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. There is plenty of room. 12. Some of us are just destined to walk this world alone. Reply. "You know I can do this anytime.". You should eat some of that makeup, so you can be pretty on the inside. Let's grab a drink" 3) "Hey, how was that [insert something specific she mentioned when you met her]?" 4) "You can stop worrying about me I made it home safely last night" April 6, 2018 There's nothing funny about being in a courtroom. The answer to this question has become so generic it feels like there is an auto-complete machine in our heads! Not even the fussiest, or clingiest person in the world would expect a dead person to reply to them. Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. I like being single. If they take several days to talk to you again, thats a sign that either they dont want to talk to you, or, they were so dirty that its taken them that song to shower. All you have to do is save this page, or commit to memory some of our favorite insults from the following list, and youll be all set. Over The Phone or On The Phone Which is Correct? As anyone who knows anything about human biology will know, when a woman misses her period, that is a sign she is pregnant.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,100],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_13',105,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0'); Therefore, if she were to rely on your messages for her period, she would be pregnant by now. If you want me to accept you as you are, Im going to have to lie to myself about liking you. You do the work of three men: Larry, Moe, and Curly. If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. Acting like a prick doesnt make yours grow bigger. [deleted] 5 yr. ago. I've come up with a compilation of funny and clever answers to the question Why are you still single?. Im reminded of how unfair life is every time I see you. Surveys show that divorce rates are nonexistent among single people. Perhaps you are just such an exciting person. I just adore my own company. Truth is, we all have ugly experiences with our past lovers. If you're really feeling them, you can give them one last chance to make up for their communication lag. In reality, they are not cool, they are just rude. How do you usually respond to the question? 59. Everyday that you're on the right side of the grass is a good day. (Say it like he or. I havent found anyone who matches my kinks yet. but that was before I read Fred's comment below. If this doesn't get a response, it's sure to get a laugh. *Siri activates front camera*. 10. Im still trying to figure out an answer to that question if Im honest. I am really just trying hard to avoid ambiguous questions at this moment. What should I doI like you too much. 12. Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?". Copyright 2011 - 2023 IncNut Stylecraze Private Limited. Because if you are, youre doing it right. Its better to be single with high standards than be in a relationship settling for less. Things You Should Know about Birth Control Pills 62 Beautiful Makeup Inspos for Girls Who Are Not Afraid to Play with Color "Like an echo asking a shadow to dance on a mirage, this one is even funnier when an ugly person says, My friend always says "gooder". Maybe you can Google it. Average, I think, that sounds about right. Too early to say, it hasnt finished yet. So, ditch the mechanical responses and adopt the witty and fun replies to keep the conversations exciting! How do you get it to curl out of your nostrils like that? I dont chase them just to satisfy my sexual desires. 43. Image: wikimedia commons 6. Giving witty and interesting responses instead of the generic Im fine is often the smartest way to kickstart a nice conversation after the greeting How Are You?. No one loves superheroes. Or, "Happy and content, thanks for asking. At minding my own business? Living a life of suppressed rage, emotional imbalance, and denial. My favorites were: "I'd rather have bamboo shoots shoved under my toenails." "I'd rather be in hell with both arms cut off." He was an angry, creative man. If I was any better, vitamins would be taking me. The 'Sex And The City' Cab Light Theory, Revisited, It's Hot When People Call You By Your Last Name, I Never Feel Older Than When I Try To Make A TikTok, Get Even More From Bustle Sign Up For The Newsletter. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. Hi! Privacy Policy. It would be great if puppies would stay puppies forever. Oh, well 8. 29. (Act suspicious of everything and everyone!). 36. I never even listen when you tell me them. Stellar, great, fantastic but dead inside. Passed into the next room and told me to tell you go fuck yourself. provided, of course, that he really is dead." It might seem like a joke, but this is what I think. I dont know how you do it, but after a shower, you look even greasier. Getting better with every passing second. 98. How are you? I dont mind you talking so much, as long as you dont mind me not listening. 93. The foundation of any effort to get your ex boyfriend back starts and ends with the no contact rule - which means you probably shouldn't be texting with him in the first place. 2. Because youre highly qualified. 25. 1. Just Smile And Nod 3 I'm Just Wondering How You Are Still with us. Because I prefer the company of dogs/cats rather than humans. 61. Looking for funny responses to everyday questions? Susan Winter, relationship expert, and bestselling author, This article was originally published on Dec. 15, 2020. It's one of the best replies to "How are you?" [Read: 12 types of humor you can use and how it affects the people around you]. Want to equip yourself with more responses? funny response to are you still alive. [Read: How to be funny and make people love your company]. I cant afford to die; Id lose too much money. George Burns (comedian), I do not fear death. Liked what you just read? 6. All rights reserved. But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. 9. 16. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Some Funny Responses to Everyday Questions. Socrates (philosopher), "The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated." After all, every single day that you're still alive is a good day overall. Search, discover and share your favorite Still Alive GIFs. Oof, gotta hide! For more information, please see our If this doesnt cause them to reply, then maybe you should rethink your friendship with this person. Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you need to act like one. As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty. 15. My bed only has enough room for me and my dog. Mentally? 91. Me being single is just a conspiracy! Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. Are you going to marry me? Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. You might just find one. Because Jamaican me crazy! I died last week, since then. This might be okay if they take up to 24 hours, but not more than that. I'm used to it, anyway. For example, if it is a friend, you can be funny or witty. "Still alive" is polite. This one is a bit depressing, which is why you should watch when you use it. 5. 90. I really thought you already knew. I dont go around asking how youre still married, do I? Of course, you don't want to brag, which is why this funny line is useful. But Ive also had better. Maybe they had a giant project at work and lost contact with all their friends and loved ones. Hello, how are you? If you're stuck in a cycle with your ex of being on and off again, but you know it's not going to work out, don't respond. You could reply with how you are doing and what has been keeping you busy lately. Im too expensive. What Is A Micro Wedding And How To Plan It? Well, I have to go to work so Ill try and make the best of it. Id love to see things from your perspective, but its almost impossible to get my head up your ass that far. 7. . 1. However, it is best to stick to the basics with a colleague. "I'm alright, mate". 35. The police? 9 Best Ways To Ask Someone To Talk On The Phone, 9 Other Ways to Say Im Good At on a Resume, 10 Polite Ways to Say No Visitors after Surgery, 11 Best Ways to Say Im Here for You to a Loved One, 10 Professional Ways to Say I Am Not Feeling Well. Sometimes, being emotional stops us from replying to the messages of others. Keep talking. Call the police." 13 Quora User I used to think you were a pain in the neck. [Read: The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company]. Stop asking me why Im single! 71. Id hug and kiss you if you were single, just like me. Id love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. 12. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. I dont think youre an idiot but whats my opinion compared to countless others? Patrick Moore (astronomer), "Sometimes I wish my first word was 'quote' so that on my deathbed, my last words could be 'end quote.'" (Use a sexy tone). The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. I'm loved! I'd love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. 96. "Ugh I was so lazy this week. There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. 94. Hopefully, not as good as I will ever be. 97. For your information, Im in a relationship with food. 382 Likes, 344 Comments. I Don't Miss, I Kiss A sweet bit of poetry that sounds super romantic. Getting into a romantic relationship with someone may seem like a good idea, but so was getting into Titanic. You just live. Hey, whered you get that nose? On Mars, cell phone reception might not be too good. There is nothing wrong with responding with a funny or witty remark if youre getting annoyed with repetitive questions. Well, are you? Your friends will expect you to say "fine" or "good," so shake things up by providing an unexpected answer. What a miracle. 78. What to say when your crush asks how you are? Aeldrion 5 yr. ago. Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. Thats because I eat Doritos chips too loudly. 75. The living are getting rarer. Eugene Lonesco (playwright), Dying is easy; its living that scares me to death. Annie Lennox (musician), If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button. Sam Levenson (humorist), Ive looked that old scoundrel death in the eyes many times but this time I think he has me on the ropes. Douglas MacArthur (general), Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up. Wilson Mizner (playwright), The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades, especially if your teammates are bad guessers. Demetri Martin (comedian), I intend to live forever or die trying. Groucho Marx (comedian), Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. William Somerset Maugham (author), The art of dying graciously is nowhere advertised in spite of the fact that its market potential is great. Milton Mayer (author), At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. I didnt realize it at first, but I grew up and turned into a Squidward. Martin has been featured as an expert in communication and teaching on Forbes and Shopify. Here's one to use when you're having a spectacular day. This one is good. Hopefully he'll compliment you right back. 4. The person who told you to be yourself gave you some bad advice. You may join me, though. Otherwise, how are people going to get the message that you dont want to keep answering the same questions with the same half-hearted answers? I once showed up twenty-four hours early for a date. I dont tell you how to live your life, dont tell me how to live mine thanks. Thats because my crush is a fictional character. Everyone has a different sense of humor. "Can't complain" is a normal response to the question, but by throwing in the following sentence, you should get a laugh. Someday, you might actually say something intelligent. If I was doing any better, I would hire you to enjoy it with me. Photo by Glenna Rankin on reshot 02 "It has been a while since I've heard from you, and at this point, I'm over it." Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on July 30, 2020: Yes, this is a very witty, funny article. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. 2. via: Pexels / George Pak. Thats why Im rooting for your penis. While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. "See, I will finally make you smile.". Nevertheless, life must go on, and sometimes you just have to go with the flow, as they sayeven if you don't want to discuss your relationship status! Sure isnt my pay, Im still pretty broke. Are you serious? I only went to the gym four times instead of my usual five." Sarcastic response: "Yeah totally. I hate to break it to you, but Im not single. They really care for you, and you better value their presence well. But, as soon as we feel better, that person no longer serves their purpose. Which just make the unexpected moments of levity all the more hilarious. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Is my relationship status a joke to you?! Also you texted very late; I would think one of my friends were joking or drunk since it's near Halloween. If you are not happy being single, then you will never be happy being in a relationship. Its the same reason why I dont post pictures of myself. Voice command: Alexa, define rock paper scissors lizard Spock. For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. 3. But, they will grow up into a dog. It could always have been worse. Some good old fashioned sarcasm, there is nothing wrong with it. More like give me a sign that. Once youre dead, youre made for life. Jimi Hendrix (musician), Death will be a great relief, no more interviews. Katharine Hepburn (actress), Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men. Herodotus (historian), You know youre old when the candles cost more than the cake. Bob Hope (comedian), Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them. EW Howe (author), There are more dead people than living, and their numbers are increasing. *sips wine/tea*. 3. No, they're prison pants. Steven Wright (comedian), "What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death." I suggest you do a little soul searching. You win the internet. Still, the ghosters ghost on. Living the dream! Get your own life first before you try sharing it. Perfect for that BRB, shower text that they never BRBd to. You may have noticed that I take a step back when we talk. I favour the "How am I what?" 81. 60. I mean, no matter how amazing our lives are, there's always something to complain about. You are waiting for their reply, and they should be aware of this. 8. #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". More like give me a sign that you're still alive. They might even steal it to use in the future. Voltaire (philosopher), "As you get older, three things happen. Youre free to go. Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. Save it for your best friend, but avoid using it on your teacher. Check-in later and well find out if I did or not. I play hard to get even if nobody is trying to get me. The hottest single of the year is me. 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No), 31+ Good Comebacks to Use in an Argument With a Girl, Roommate Is Always in Living Room (How To Resolve This), Roommate Brings Unwanted Guests Home! If someone is going to ask you the same old everyday questions, I dont think Im being unreasonable when I say theyre probably just going through the motions and not really interested in your answer. Im glad that I sleep so peacefully, knowing that Im single and aint nobody cheating on me tonight. Being single is much better than being married. As unlikely as this is, it might be wise to double-check. Wait, are you my Superman/Wonder Woman? Single is the new blackif that even makes sense! She is a Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner from The Priority Academy and has over 17 years of experience in content writing and editing for online media. Im single by choice. Another excuse that people use is Im just hoping in the shower. So the next time someone asks you why you're still. I have a feeling that my soulmate is somewhere out there pushing a pull door right now. Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. 27. I hated you the moment I met you, and I still hate you. I dont know where you got your looks, but I hope you kept the receipt. Share the best GIFs now >>> 1. The only thing offending me right now is your face. Furthermore, he has teaching experience from Aarhus University. 2. I cant even afford to feed myself! Relationship expert Susan Winter recommends gracefully leaving as the quickest and easiest way out. There might be little things that go wrong throughout your life, but at least you're still living it. 62. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website.

Whatever Happened To David Nelson, Molly's Cupcakes Nutritional Information, Articles F